Some Days Are Like This

Woke up today sad. "Am I depressed?" I thought.

Dreamed of past people in my life... "Am I mourning?" ...Realized I am not depressed, the enemy is a liar!

I AM mourning all the past losses. Lost opportunities to a lack of knowing:

A lack of knowing how to express myself effectively at times

A lack of knowing how to keep firm boundaries.

A lack of knowing strong Christians.

AND

Loss of people who aren't good for me or my soul, who aren't living for GOD. Chosen losses.

Then, I pray, "Give me wisdom GOD and it comes."

GOD is providing Christian friends now!

GOD is helping me set boundaries now!

GOD is helping me express myself now!

GOD LOVES ME!

I place my focus on him, not what I've lost in my past nor what I regret.

AND I honor the sadness within.

AND I realize this too shall pass.

AND I remind myself........

GOD chose my family.

GOD chose when to save me.

GOD chose my children.

GOD CHOSE.

AND GOD knew I would know right from wrong and be unable, at times, to make it happen due to:

Being human

Not having the skills

Sin

Pressure

Emotion

And many other things.

I am a FORGIVEN CHILD OF GOD and he promises me in his very own precious words....

Michelle, when you confess your sins, I will cleanse you from all unrighteousness. (1st John 1.9)

GOD, I confess I have been a prisoner of regret far too long.

I confess I have held things against myself far too long when I didn't know how to______________. Fill in the blank!

I forgive myself and GOD forgives me.

I can walk in forgiveness today.

The enemy is a liar. When he taunts me with my sins, I will remind him and myself of this fact.

I am only human.

I have done the best I can.

Now, GOD can do his best in and thru me.

After all, again in his word, he says, "Without me, NOTHING is possible." (John 15.5)

Michelle, you are forgiven. I love you. Forgive yourself.

Thank you GOD for your wisdom today.

I need you for everything and in everything.

I love you too Lord and yes, I forgive me....AGAIN!

Some days are like this. At lease, some days are like this for me.